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*acs-lucifer

i dont know where she gets it...
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About Me Premium Member Deviously Deviant THE'Y ΛІ£X15/Male/Unknown Recent Activity Deviant for 3 Months
3 Month Premium Membership Statistics 21 Deviations
801 Comments
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аcѕ†• : :floating:.♥.

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Start a thread

What's your Favorite movie to win the Oscar for Best Picture in the 90's? 

25%
5 deviants said Titanic (1997)
20%
4 deviants said Braveheart (1995)
15%
3 deviants said Schindler's List (1993)
15%
3 deviants said Forrest Gump (1994)
10%
2 deviants said Dances with Wolves (1990)
5%
1 deviant said The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
5%
1 deviant said I did not like any of these films
5%
1 deviant said I have not seen any of these films
0%
No deviants said Unforgiven (1992)
0%
No deviants said The English Patient (1996)
5 comments, Previous Polls

Shoutbox

*Disturbed313:iconDisturbed313:
=D heeeey
Fri Nov 13, 2009, 8:01 AM
~werewolf1529:iconwerewolf1529:
im back in,
Sun Nov 1, 2009, 2:25 AM
~davidlital:icondavidlital:
Thanks for the fave! Rawk on!
Wed Aug 19, 2009, 9:52 PM
=shioriXglace:iconshioriXglace:
I love you sweetie pie cutie pinch adorable luffnens!!!! <33
Sat Aug 15, 2009, 8:13 AM
*acs-lucifer:iconacs-lucifer:
x3
Fri Aug 14, 2009, 8:53 PM

STARVATION

Journal Entry: Sat Aug 15, 2009, 10:21 PM
Hey.~<
i need to push this "fast" to its limits.
i want more progress && now.
i'm going crazy.
this is killing me, it's become a bad addiction. i need help :invisible:
It's easy to fake an emotion, when you're known for being like that for so long. I've always felt sad, like scared, mostly fear, scared i might be left alone. I've never wanted to be close to anyone. Memories from when i was really young haunt me each night and day when i black out. In school, i tried to be good and fit in like nothing was ever wrong. I always hid the truth with my socialworker and phsyciatrist, who once wanted to refer me to a phsyco-therapist for saying "i want to see a dead body"...i was 8. OH but w/e lets just say he got it off a TV show says dad; i was let off with a double dosage. "Keep him under watch at all times" says my SW--yeah thanks b!tch.Ihatepeople.&& how they get away with doing crimes every sec around the fucking world. If only GOD dropped a good 500k ton rock on each person who committed a sin. WHY WAS I BORN?,WHY ARE WE HERE?, WHATS THE MEANING OF LIFE? I have one answer.. nothings REAL. ITS not REAL. WE'rE in a DREAM.WE'RE IN A NEVER ENDING DREAM TILL WE ALL WAKE UP ON THE DEATH LINE.f*ck this world. I've always been either miserable,scared,unsecured pushed away or alone; alot like thoughts of being a mistake.UGH! i'm sick and tired of being caged, tied down, orderd around and controlled..I'm sick and fucking tired of it all. Please GOD help me, change me, make me pure..wash my eyes from all that i've seen. I've always been a reject, confused in what or who i was to be. I was raised to never make mistakes, and taking chances where for ones with no shame. if i did somthing, anything, i'd get yelled at or hit..i'm mature enough to say that i understand that people go through shit and can easily put their anger on a child--I was so youn, you should have known, now i cry in the middleof the night && scream in my dreams from all that you've said to me, memories of verbal and physical torture. "But this matter stays under the roof son"-I know dad, it's none of anyones business what you do to me because you created me, i know .. and i be what you tell me to be, i know and i do what you tell me to do, and ill just fucking die when you tell me to drop dead. IT HURTS IT REALLY HURTS.
YOU MADE ME THIS WAY AND FOR WHAT??? TO OBEY YOU TO FUCKING OBEY YOU, SO TELL ME WHAT TO DO TELL ME WHAT TO FUCKING DO??
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CRAZY EMOTES


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Evil Angel"†♥

Hold it together, birds of a feather,
Nothing but lies and crooked wings.
I have the answer, spreading the cancer,
You are the faith inside me.
†♥
No, don't
Leave me to die here,
Help me survive here.
Alone, don't remember, remember.
†♥
Put me to sleep evil angel.
Open your wings evil angel.
†♥
I'm a believer,
Nothing could be worse,
All these imaginary friends. Hiding betrayal,
Driving the nail,
Hoping to find a savior.
†♥
No, don't
Leave me to die here,
Help me survive here.
Alone, don't
Surrender, surrender.
†♥
Fly over me evil angel.
Why can't I breathe evil angel?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FRIENDZ
:icongaybiworld: :iconshiorixglace: :iconsuddensting: :iconorngsumb: :iconfoxcall: :iconangelgabrielg: :iconc0pyright: :iconlilypotter13: :iconlightningtremlett: :iconpinkangel48: :iconheavybladeookami: :iconxxmidnight-spiralxx: :iconcash3w-53: :iconhetl: :iconblindhunter1994: :iconxtokio483zimmerx: :iconzutoph507: :iconskyfersspirit::iconlizaslilprotege::iconchellocleiico::iconapplefudge::iconinkprivacy::iconliars-sin::iconpaxxie::iconjoshinu-panther::icondragon-queen01456::iconfunanimation-909::iconaristocraticamigo::iconwerewolf1529::iconbeatlemaniac14::iconlittleemobunnie::iconanimeface::iconpom-wonderful94::iconinsaneillusionz::icondisturbed313:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
chats i'm in
:icongaybiworld: && :iconrainbowsanctuary:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
want to thank :iconzutoph507: for taking time to draw me in manga version!!
guys check it OUT >
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FAVE dAWORK
~~~


**I'm starting a very serious starvation diet starting today...(aug16/09)**
When there is only a single star left in the sky..
At that very moment, the path of forgiveness will close.
WE ARE ALL IN A DREAM SOON tO WAKE UP.
*~*PrOuD sUpPoRtEr Of StAmPs*~*






Flower :STOCK: by =sourcow | Arabesque Brushes by ~Luizalenora | Foliage Swirls by *redheadstock | Twirl Border Brushes by =kuschelirmel-stock
29 Comments | Previous Journal Entries
  • Mood: Miserable
  • Listening to: thebeginningistheend-smashingpumpkins
  • Drinking: water
Skin by =KonekoD

deviantID

umm..:icongaybiworld:

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: kurtassbazzar
  • Interests: mi camera
  • Favourite movie: watchmen
  • Favourite band or musician: smashingpumpkins
  • Favourite genre of music: rock/heavymetal
  • Favourite artist: me
  • Favourite poet or writer: annerice
  • Favourite photographer: me
  • Favourite style of art: mistyle
  • MP3 player of choice: itouch
  • Favourite game: halo2
  • Personal Quote: oh mi god

Journal History

IM SO STARTING TOMORROW

BREATHE ME- SIA
Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

ANA/MIA ED NERVOSA





SOMEONE HELP

аcѕ†• : .♥.
Maybe it isn’t me, maybe this is a dream. A nightmare.
Maybe I will wake up soon, and my life can begin again.
There she is, staring back at me through this wretched mirror.
It only deceives me. Ruins me.
Oh, but how good I am at this game.
This never-ending, sleepless, heartless,
Empty game I call my life.
I cannot win or lose,
But merely wander until I fade and wither away.
No satisfaction. Constant worry, misery,
Disappointment and pain.
It is not I living it. It cannot be.
Here I stand, in front of this mirror once again.
Staring, wishing, waiting.
Waiting for a change.
Wishing that if I stare long enough,
Just maybe I will see something that I overlooked before.
Something worth loving.
But it never comes.
This misery has diminished my hope, and with it my life.
I am the melancholy girl who stares out the window late at night
Watching the lights fade,
The cars passing,
Trying to catch a glimpse of promise.
Trying to see what other people see.
I am the one who spends long nights on the bathroom floor
Sobbing about who I have become- what I have become.
Yes, I am the girl who dreams of being beautiful,
Yet so easily reduced to tears by this wretched mirror.
It is not I walking these halls.
Absent-mindedly smiling.
For inside I am dying.
How do they not see?
I have become a shell of a person.
I have mastered the art of faking “I’m fine.”
Forcing a smile is second nature.
My life is a contest with myself.
An endless race to a nonexistent finish line.
And how good at this game I am.
Yet, People see a happy girl.
Loving,
Talking,
Laughing,
Smiling,
But what they don’t see is the
Hurting,
Crying
Screaming,
Dying."

Comments


:iconlittleemobunnie:
~LittleEmoBunnie Nov 19, 2009, 1:13:46 PM
Thanks for the favs.

--
A secret is best kept unsaid...
:iconamazingly-fantastic1:
~amazingly-fantastic1 Nov 18, 2009, 4:00:46 PM
thanks for all of the favorite

--
---------------------------------------------------------

Would it be okay?
Would it be okay if I took your breath away?


you had me at hello
:iconapplefudge:
~Applefudge Nov 14, 2009, 4:28:21 AM
:)

--
When we're good they never remember,
When we're bad they NEVER forget..
:iconxxmidnight-spiralxx:
~xXMidnight-SpiralXx Nov 12, 2009, 7:19:12 AM
hey! :D how's it going? we haven't talked for awhile.

--
is obsessed with changing meh icon
and male anime characters XD
time for a new list of pairings:
Schneizel/Kanon
Richter/Emil
Beyond/Mikami
Ike/Marth
Tobirama/Izuna
Yoji/Natsuo
Seimei/Kio
Seto/Joey
thats all for now. ^_^
:iconacs-lucifer:
*acs-lucifer Nov 14, 2009, 4:30:46 AM
аcѕ†• : hey sup

--
†Λ.c.s† †
εЇз аηа⁄fоя⁄lіfе
†неlрме неlрме неlрме
:iconxxmidnight-spiralxx:
~xXMidnight-SpiralXx Nov 16, 2009, 7:06:54 AM
nothing much, you? :3

--
is obsessed with changing meh icon
and male anime characters XD
time for a new list of pairings:
Schneizel/Kanon
Richter/Emil
Beyond/Mikami
Ike/Marth
Tobirama/Izuna
Yoji/Natsuo
Seimei/Kio
Seto/Joey
thats all for now. ^_^
:iconblindhunter1994:
~BlindHunter1994 Nov 12, 2009, 6:39:44 AM
hey, what you doing?

--
I am more wolf than human, you have no idea...
:iconacs-lucifer:
*acs-lucifer Nov 12, 2009, 6:49:26 AM
Trying clear my messages and submitted deviations from peeps
I have 137 to go =]

What's up?

--
†Λ.c.s† †
εЇз аηа⁄fоя⁄lіfе
†неlрме неlрме неlрме
:iconblindhunter1994:
~BlindHunter1994 Nov 12, 2009, 6:53:27 AM
nothing, i think my friend died last night, so i feel like shit,
and how long were you gone anyways?

--
I am more wolf than human, you have no idea...
:iconacs-lucifer:
*acs-lucifer Nov 12, 2009, 7:00:08 AM
What!? you think your friend died last night??
How?
What do you mean...

--
†Λ.c.s† †
εЇз аηа⁄fоя⁄lіfе
†неlрме неlрме неlрме
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